What the???

Today was just a messed up day.

I got to school in a relatively decent mood. Then people had to show up. Seems that the schedule we agreed on had been revised 3 or 4 times...since yesterday. I was actually scheduled to teach today ( ! ) and I did, but at every step I had to find other teachers to ask what the hell was going on, who was doing what and for how long. In spite of that, I actually got some work done with kids that helped them with their projects that I'm really not involved with. In my mind anyway, after lunch I was supposed to work with one group of kids for the last 2 hours. I didn't have to, but it worked out that they had nothing scheduled and needed something and I didn't have to chauffeur anyone at that time so I jumped on it. I spent a couple of hours last night getting this cool role play ready and right after lunch I'm told that my lesson was scrapped.

I threw a fit. Not a big fit. Not a hissy fit. But an unprofessional fit. And while I was in the staff office when I threw it, for some unexplained reason, there was a bunch of kids in there. It was just all my professional frustration...day-after-day of not knowing what we were doing; of things in constant flux and I lost it.

I will say this about my co-workers...they sure do give in to dramatics. It has never failed. I don't calculate this stuff, but whenever I go diva, I get what I want. But honestly, my diva-ness only comes out when there's prolonged incompetence. But I'm sure Whitney says that, too.

So I did my lesson. It was chaotic and I had a hard time keeping them in control, but in the end it went well and all the kids enjoyed it and I think my academic propaganda got through. And so the day ended. Or so I thought....

Kids are being kids...acting all crazy as it's time to leave. I go out into the hall and there's one of my lovely little children. Now, confidentiality issues mean I can't go into too much detail here, but this kid is one of our..."special" kids. He's very awkward socially, a bit defiant. He's a borderline Hillside kid. Maybe a day treatment kid. But to the layperson, he's weird and a bit of a dick.

So the kid comes up to me in the hall and says:

Kid: I heard we don't have school tomorrow because it's Halloween.

Mr. A: I don't know about that, but the teachers have an all-day training. It may have been scheduled for tomorrow because of that, but I don't know if that's the reason.

Kid: Oh...OK. [Mr. A turns to walk away] Mr. Atias?

Mr. A: [Turns around to face Kid] Yeah?

Kid: Would you like a massage? I give massages.

Mr. A: [Extremely awkward pause followed by response using a volume level that showed uncomfortableness] No thanks! I'm good! See ya tomorrow!

[End scene.]

Where the fuck did that come from? Every teacher in the program I told this to had dumbfounded looks on their faces.

FIRST IT WAS WOMEN, NOW I'M TURNING PRE-PUBESCENT BOYS GAY!!!!

I sure wish I could harness this power I seem to have.

***************************************************************

I was going to end the post here, but I thought I should elaborate just so no one gets the wrong idea.

I really can't go into details about the kid, but let's just say that anything involving physical contact with any human is out of character for him. And he doesn't initiate interactions unless he wants something. Our reactions were not about the possible orientation issues, but more of the special ed issues. The fact that it involved borderline hitting on a teacher is secondary.

This Is Your Life

Whoa...

So Nart sent me an e-mail giving me a rundown of what he's been up to for the past...oh...20 years. Hmmm...uh...kinda makes my stuff look pretty insignificant. So, when it was my turn to let him know what I've been doing. It was actually kinda sad.

For better or worse, I highly recommend that you do what I just did. Type or write as if you were telling someone you haven't seen for 20 years...what have you been up to during that time. I just finished, so I'm still kind of distilling it, but it was humbling.

I was going to post what I sent in that e-mail, but eh...for right now I prefer to inflict my pathos on one person at a time.

The Joys of Cyberstalking

Yeah, I know. It's creepy, but come on, like other things that no one talks about, we all do it. I have no idea where I am on the spectrum, but I admit, from time-to-time I'll try to find an old friend. It rarely pays off, but what it lacks in quantity, usually gets made up for in quality.

I don't think anyone's going to remember this reference...maybe my Mom...maybe Ed. But back in the Syracuse days I had a roommate who was from Jordan. His father was the Jordanian ambassador to France, so he spent breaks in Paris...the poor bastard. After I left, he was the one person I went back to visit, but eventually lost touch with him. I did have a phone number for his family in Amman (I'm finding it spelled 2 different ways)...and when I was living with Ed on Edmonds Street, the US started bombing Jordan for some reason...as if we ever need a reason to bomb anyone... I was laid up with a busted ankle and drunk and called him to see if he was OK...at 3am his time, waking up his family. Sound familiar, Felix?

Anyway, while I remember him with his underwear on his head in college (and other things I'd rather not mention) he ended up becoming this serious big-wig for a major Arab news agency. Dude was never into journalism. [Correction: wait a minute...he majored in journalism...I don't remember him going to class...oh wait...that was me...nevermind] As I've cyberstalked him over the years, I noticed that he's getting interviewed by CNN and others on serious stuff...and I'm thinking...I remember that guy puking...and other things I'd rather not mention.

The funny thing was, I could not find contact info for the guy. No matter what I did...nothing. So this past weekend I thought I'd throw his name into Google once again. Seems that he has a new gig working for Reuters in London. There was some conference where he was speaking...did I mention that I remember the cast of his broken leg banging against the wall when he was having sex with his girlfriend...and other things I don't want to talk about.

So I found a generic e-mail address for a conference that was over months ago and sent them a note asking that if they had dude's e-mail, if they could forward mine to him, blah, blah, blah. When I woke up this morning this was in my mailbox:

You have no idea how many times I have tried to find you! I even tried to find people who might give me your news but with no luck. So much to tell you, but wanted to drop a quick line to establish contact. Tell me everything..
Well done going through ABF and all the best
Nart

Today was the first time I was in a genuinely good mood in a long time. Even the chaos at work didn't matter. I sure hope this isn't the start of some kind of bromance.

Just kidding, I was just trying to find a way to use the word "bromance". But whether he knows it or not, Nart was really influential for me on how I see the world. Oh, I don't think we agree on a lot of stuff, but it definitely gave me perspective. And I remember his laugh...it was really distinctive.

Oh my God, this is a bromance!

Seriously, just kidding.

This could be...

...the greatest feat in the history of music.

Half-Empty or Half-Full

I'm going to go with half-full today.

I had to do laundry before work. Right before I left, I did a quick financial inventory...supposed I wanted to leave here in December, even if I didn't have a job. Hmmmm...not that possible. I haven't been getting my debt lowered as much as I wanted to. So I resigned myself to - if I can get a job before December, then I'll leave.

So I went to the laundromat. What has been a habit, if I'm doing laundry in the morning or early afternoon, I usually give Jimena a call, though I was a bit hesitant. I know I've said this a million times, but I truly am getting tired of using my friends (and this blog) as just people to bitch to. But again, a habit is a habit.

As usual, our conversation went well. She doesn't seem to mind my grumpiness. But when I told her about not being able to come back no matter what she started questioning me on that. So, I don't know if it's going to happen (it would mean a longer stint in the Kaminski guest room), but it did get me a bit motivated.

Today's pretty dead at the Y - I'm there now - so I've spent most of my time applying for more gigs. The Center for Youth Services, the United Way & Continuing Developmental Services (CDS). I also did a little online research as to what I may get for my car...from what I still owe, I'm going to get spanked on that no matter when I leave.

Each Friday...when we have our staff meeting at school, to plan the next week, I get more fed up. I can't believe that anyone would think we're doing what's best for our kids. The sad thing is, looking at the state of education in Hawaii, we're not really that bad. But I can't work like this. I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing on a day-to-day basis. I didn't even work like that when I was in a cottage at Hillside.

But I'm going to keep cranking out those resumes and we'll see what happens. I have less than a month until I have to start giving notices (job & apt) if I'm going to leave in December.

Stupid Third World Country pt. 12

I'm working at the Y tonight. And for whatever reason, a bird, a slight breeze, whatever, the power goes out. When it comes back on a few seconds later the fire alarm won't turn off and a burning plastic smell starts spreading through the lobby.

Of course I can't find a flashlight or a director. Finally, the fitness director comes in...I've already called the fire department. She tells me to evacuate the building.

I can't get these idiots to leave. I'm serious. It's worse than a Middle School fire drill. I had to tap a dumbass on the head who refused to get out of the pool - he wouldn't listen to the lifeguard. Idiots wanted to shower first.

Eh brah...how you like dose toxic fumes?

Jeez.

Stupid Cute Kids

So it's been another week at school of organizational chaos...every day I / we have to pull ideas and decisions out of our asses thanks to no leadership and no structure. I'm trying not to show my frustration in front of the kids, but it's difficult.

Mini-Tangent Alert: I've already started looking for work back in Rochester. I sent resume's to the Center for Disability Rights for a Manager of Deaf Services and to Alternatives for Battered Women, for a Domestic Violence Education Coordinator. I contacted the City School District and updated my online teaching application through BOCES. Around Thanksgiving I'll pick it up for smaller gigs. OK...Tangent over.

So, thanks to not being able to get anything cool for us to do this week for our field outing (I found out about that I had to plan it last Friday afternoon) I took kids to the library to do research for their upcoming science projects, that I'm really not involved with. Because we've pretty much gone to tracking the kids, today's group was the "good" group. The teachers call them that in private and the rest of the kids do as well. But I digress.

One of my little 6th graders finished her assignment early, and being a little hyper she decided to hang around Mr. Atias and talk. Well, I'm starting to wonder if I should be flattered or not that the kids feel comfortable in saying anything around me. Somehow this child came to the conclusion that I need a wife. (I know, I know)

Well, it seems that she has taken it on as her mission in life to find me a wife. Great. An arranged marriage. By an 11-year-old. My life has sunk to this. At least she stopped trying to pawn off her grandmother on me. (Grandma actually lives in Rochester of all places...and the kid's parents are from the Flower City...as the ice cream truck/child abduction van plays every day in my hood: it's a small world afterall.)

She's threatening to put an ad in the Maui News.

Stupid cute kids.

Seriously though...I'm starting to get an oogy feeling...the new 6th graders are starting to bond with me. And I'm going to leave.

Humbug!

You May Need Some Caffine For This

Norm Chomsky isn't the most dynamic speaker in the world, but if you have a cup of coffee and 10 minutes to spare, this is interesting.

Save Me a Shovel

Well, that may be a bit premature, but I've stepped up my timetable a bit. Work's gotten to be a bit too much, especially if my non-work hours suck as bad as they do. So I'm starting to look for work back in Rochester for January. Again, doesn't mean I'm coming. If I find a job, cool. Right now, I'll even take a long-term sub job if it lasts the rest of the school year.

The charter school has just gotten too unpredictable. We have one teacher who goes on her own and books these massive extra-curricular stuff that affects the entire school and the lead teacher insists on planning the next week on the Friday before. I just found out on Friday afternoon that I have to plan our field outing for this coming week. That's bullshit. I'm just tired of having no control over my schedule, I have no idea what I'm teaching from day to day. Right now, it's just a job and one I don't really like that much, so if I have nothing else going on in Hawaii, I really don't have a reason to stay.

So, I'll see if I can figure something out for the holiday. I've already sent a note to the City School District and I'll update my teaching stuff on the BOCES website for a bunch of the suburban schools. And I'll be scoping out all the social agencies.

Let me know if you see any gigs you think I could survive in.

Oh...brief PS...I was talking to a few people about a possible gig with Amnesty International. I was just informed that with the economy that they've instituted a hiring freeze and the postition won't be posted for (at least) six months if ever.

I Dare You to Download These

I've been meaning to get around to this and it's been dead at the Y so here it is...

Whitee Ringtones!!!

Yep. You download them to your computer then do whatever voodoo you need to to get it to your phone. Usually a USB cord does the trick, though you may have to get a driver for it.

Jesus Just Wants to Dance
Sexmom
The Stuart Bedasso Theme Song

They're safe for work...relatively...Sexmom is close to the line. They're less than 30 seconds of the beginning of each. Enjoy.

Just Because I Can

Back to School

Today was the first day back after the break. Which was good...I needed to get back in a routine. I feel very unproductive otherwise. I didn't do any of the "relaxing" stuff I said I was going to, but I did get some stuff done that absolutely needed to.

I'm pretty much in a coasting kind of mode where school's concerned. The way things are going and with my future pretty much set, I'm not going to try to plan some huge project, I'll just hitch onto the science ones and put my stamp on those. For example, the next one the kids have to do is to - in pairs - find some environmental cause on the island that needs changing and come up with a solution. I'm not explaining it very well, but it has potential.

So to do this, the kids will have to find out if any organization or group is working on the same thing. So we're going over the branches and levels of government. Then we'll be looking at all the environmental groups on the island. And I'll also be teaching a lot of kids about working with video. Not the traditional social studies stuff, but it'll keep my interest up.

Catching Up

Since I turned the blog into something "private", a bunch of folks changed their e-mail addresses. So I re-did some invitations and added a few more. That should get everyone updated. Let me know if there's anything different I should do.

I guess you can assume it's a pretty dead day at the Y. People just aren't choosing to get themselves clean, have a good meal, do whatever they feel.

New Podcast

By the way, Jill & I did a pretty good show last night. If you need to kill an hour, check it out. You can also hear it on our MySpace Page.

A Day Late, $2300 Short

Here's a mildly amusing thing that happened last week. This was primarily a voicemail conversation I had with someone. I got a call from an area code I didn't recognize so I let it go to VM and checked it later. It seems that Summer was just endorsed by Emily's List. A PAC of female democrats who normally endorse in national-level races. The person calling need information so they could make a donation. So I called her back and got her voicemail so I could tell her that we lost in the Primary 2 weeks ago.

Ah...there's nothing like a well-organized team, eh.

Today

So today I had a chance to talk with the lovely & talented Molly Clifford. You know...NET Office, ran Bob Duffy's campaign.

We chatted about how things were going in Rochester...and how things are doing in a certain section of Rochester...and she even said to hurry back because Rochester needs me...

...and I don't think she was being completely sarcastic.

{sigh}

She called me buddy...

Where's My Sticker?

I voted today. By absentee ballot. I figured there was a possibility that I'd be busy on election day...with Summer's campaign. So I got an absentee ballot. It was interesting. The state has a state Board of Education. There's no local rule. I didn't even know there was anyone up for it. I had to do some quick online research and I couldn't find much. I didn't vote in one of the races because I couldn't find info on either person. And then there's the OHA races. The Office of Hawaiian Affairs. I didn't feel it was appropriate that I vote for that, so I left it blank. Jesus, we need to give these islands back to the Hawaiians and get the fuck out.

State Rep...both were so repugnant, I couldn't vote for either. I voted for the relative progressives in every election for County Council. Then there was the biggie...yep. You know where I went. Cynthia McKinney has at least one vote now. Remember...if you're in a definite Obama state (cough...cough...New York) the Green Party only needs 5% of the vote.

On the back of the ballot were two referendum issues. One was lowering the age requirement to run for Governor from 30 to 25. I didn't know that was going to be on the ballot, but I voted No. I gave it serious thought...Age doesn't make someone a good candidate - look at McCain - but I've found that life experience is important. Sure, there'll be exceptions to that...people who are "older than their years," but I'm back to being an "elitist". I want people in charge who are experienced. It's the kind of experience that helps you differentiate in the booth.

But the most interesting one was the referendum that every state has from time to time...the dreaded Constitutional Convention...[insert dramatic music here]...should there be one.

I remember the last time New York had to deal with that. Oooh was there a lot of discussion. The main argument then, and now, and in every referendum, is that the special interests will get ahold of it and will make things worse.

Now, stop and think about this for a minute. The people who hold this view are labeled "pragmatic". I label them "lazy ass bitches". Because, at best, they may e-mail a letter to the editor, but would never dream of traveling to their state capital and demanding that the convention be upright. They wouldn't take off from work and bring their kids to lobby their representatives. Hell, they wouldn't even put that stupid bluetooth thing in their ear and call their state rep while going from Starbucks to Crap-Mart.

I voted "yes". And when it comes up in New York...I'll vote and lobby "yes" again.

I'm not an idealist, I'm just fed up.

So, where's my "I Voted Today" sticker? This state sucks.

Quick Update

Hey Gang,

I know I haven't posted in a while. I'm on "vacation", from school anyway. I've been working at the Y, doing a few radio shifts and just trying to catch up on a few things that needs attention. I'm also spending a lot of mental energy figuring out what I'm going to be doing post-Hawaii. A few ideas are taking shape and...well, we'll see. I've already started talking to a few people about...uh, things. Let's just leave it at that for now.

So, there's not much stuff happening right now. I'll be jumping into my prep for the next school quarter in a couple of days, then it'll be back to the grind.

Tootles.